You are here: Home Editor's Beat Ask Margo Ask Margo: Thinking about sex instead of sexual health? You ain’t alone sport
  • Increase font size
  • Default font size
  • Decrease font size

L.A. Beat

Ask Margo: Thinking about sex instead of sexual health? You ain’t alone sport

E-mail Print

Q- Hey Margo, Sex, sex, sex, sex, all I think about is sex. Is there something wrong with me?

Dear Pervert, I dunno. Is there something wrong with you? You get to decide champ. If your thoughts are uncontrollable, ’cause you distress and interfere with many aspects of your life (work, friendships, partners…etc) then I would think you do have a problem.

Seek help from a professional therapist of your choosing. If it’s just a case of frequent horniness, then don’t worry your sex-filled head about it. Some people think about food all the time and they eat a lot of it too. How is that really any different?

Some people have higher sex drives than others, and individual sex drives fluctuate during the day, week, month, year and lifespan. Sex (even if it’s just with yourself) is a big part of our lives, our private lives. Keeping it private makes it seem like we all just don’t think about it, but we do. Some more than others.

Q: Margo, this is hard to write to you about but I am going to anyway. I got checked and found out I have an STD. I don’t know who it was from and I don’t know if I should say anything or what I should say to the guy I sometimes spend time with. The doctor said it was common and treatable. So I could tell this guy about it and if he gets checked and ends up having it too neither of us will know if I gave it to him or if he gave it to me. I’m really embarrassed so do I have to say something to him?

A: Am I crazy or can’t you just leave this unpleasant dilemma up to the clinic to take care of? I’m going to guess that you’ve got yourself some chlamydia. (I’m guessing this because it’s curable and it is so common that my family doctor says that he sees and treats chlamydia all the effin time.) So if it is chlamydia (clinics ask you to list your sexual history when certain STD’s come up positive and chlamydia is supposed to be one of them) then isn’t the clinic obliged to ask about your partner history and then do all the dirty work for you by calling up all the dudes you had sex with to tell them they should get tested? I’m pretty sure I’m right about this.  

Even if the clinic does tell him, you really should talk to him about it. Worst case scenario is that you talk to him only to find out (after being tested) that he doesn’t have it and that you’ve just outted yourself for no reason. Hope that he is grown up enough to keep this info to himself, though I have to say that ‘guess who’s got an STD’ gossip is not unheard of and can be as rampant as chlamydia itself.

Most people just can’t keep their trap shut; so I understand why you are reluctant to say anything to him.

If you haven’t been using a condom then he probably does have what you got, and in that case you are right that you’ll likely never know who gave it to whom. What’s the use in trying to figure that out anyway?

Because really, STD’s can happen to anyone who does it without a condom (did you know that?) and anytime we get carnal (sometimes even with a condom) we put ourselves at risk of getting an STD.

Unless the infected partner knew about their condition, how is it really fair to blame them? And since most, if not all of us have gone bareback at one point (find me someone who claims never to have done this and I will say I found me a liar) how can we really judge? Plus, the one you got is common and treatable which helps take the shame right out of it. It goes away with pills, so whatever right? It’s not like the end of the world.
Ask Margo for advice. Email questions to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
Confidentiality, an open mind, and a sense of humour totally assured.

— By Margo, Special To L.A. Beat
{jcomments on} 
The ONLY Gig Guide that matters


Music Beat

Lights. Camera. Action.
Inside L.A. Inside

CD Reviews


Music Beat News

Art Beat News

Drama Beat News

Museum Beat News