Q-My girlfriend casually mentioned she wants to start having children in the next five years and then looked at me right after she said it.
I didn’t respond and the conversation moved on to something else. I didn’t tell her I don’t think I ever want kids. Do I tell her now? We have been dating for about four months or so and I am happy to be with her but don’t know what to say about kids.
A- If she asks you, than yes; tell her. She was fishing, and since you didn’t react she probably got the hint you are not keen to discuss it right now. You can probably count on it that she will bring it up again.
But try not to worry. Anything can happen in five years. Also, make sure you are using a reliable form of birth control. Just sayin’.
Q- Dear Margo, I read your column where you talk about snooping to catch men who may be cheating on their girlfriends but it hardly talks about how to do it.
If my boyfriend is cheating he won’t be easy to catch because he doesn’t email, or doesn’t have anything on his phone that he would hide, and if he did he would delete it before he gets home. So saying that you can snoop doesn’t really help me.
I think that he is cheating on me late at night after the bar with girls that he doesn’t call afterwards, or doesn’t give his number to. Anyway, I don’t think I’m going to find anything in his phone.
I’ve also tried to talk to him about his late nights, and my suspicions but he just gets mad at me.
Is that a sign that he is cheating? How do I find out? Do I confront him again?
A- We’ve all heard it many times before: that women supposedly get a feeling their partners are cheating and that feeling is usually right and blah-blah-blah.
But really, should you be acting and possibly destroying your relationship on that feeling alone? It’s a toughie. Ask yourself if it’s possible you are being suspicious for no good reason.
Some people have a hard time trusting their partner and obsess about what the partner is doing when they are not around. If you are one of those people, better to accept it, work on getting better at trusting your partner, and maybe even consider dating someone who doesn’t have the late night lifestyle, and instead go for the solid (but possibly boring) type that will call often, reassure you, and all that jazz. How do find out if he’s cheating? I know.
The next time he gets home from one of his late nights, just flat out ask to smell his dick. Or even better, offer to give him a blow-job right then and there. If he says no, then you know you have a problem.